Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Questioning or Disloyalty?

Someone called me today and told me they missed my blog. I did not know I had such a large following :) I have been in somewhat of a malaise lately. My mentor is moving on and I have had to handle many issues that normally would not be mine. I have also been reflecting often on the passing of the two gentlemen mentioned in my previous post.

I am following up a post from a few months ago with a similar title. Over the past couple of months, I also have really had many questions running through my mind regarding our doctrine and methodology in our movement. I have struggled with some of the stands we take and some of the issues surrounding our metaphor.

I have talked through the issues with some good friends and some people for whom I have high regard. It has been good for my soul. I have also had also found myself really asking the hard questions of faith. I will be sharing some of these soul struggles in future posts.

I shared with a friend that I would be blogging about the issues with which I have been struggling. My friend encouraged me to continue to wrestle with the issues. However, the same friend cautioned me about the forum in which I share my questions, because I might be viewed as "disloyal" to our movement.

To say I was somewhat taken aback by that view is an understatement. Since when are legitimate questions of faith and methodology, framed respectively, disloyal. I believe the days of fall in line and march are gone. I believe not questioning breeds shallow people and in fact will hurt our movement. In this day, while I believe we need people who are faithful to the movement, it is probably unrealistic to believe that people will not question or that their questioning is disloyal. Expecting people to do something because you say so probably never was realistic.

In fact, to discourage questioning may be a sign of insecurity by those who think honest questioning is disloyal. The Midrash, is in fact, an old tradition of faith where honest and often heated debate was encouraged for building depth in the fellowship. People who were and are part of this tradition keep us accountable and hold us to a high standard.

So is questioning doctrine, faith, authority and methodology disloyal or a longing for something better for our movement? Am I just a malcontent in my questioning and challenging what I see as the status quo? Am I just being whiny?

What do you think?