Tyranny of the Impossible?

I am going to step out of my normal questioning mode (sort of) for this post.

I have always felt somewhat like a square peg in a round hole in my journey in The Salvation Army. I went through a stage in my life where I really tried to conform to the system, all the way. I was miserable. In fact, my conformity and my subsequent disappointment with the organization for what I felt was a lack of reward for my attempt at conforming, led to a very dark period for me emotionally.

So now I am in a position in which I feel, at times, is pushing me toward conforming to practices which make me uncomfortable. It is not that these practices are illegal or unethical. My spirit makes me feel as if they are not graceful enough. I think that many of these practices, lead to a sense of despair for many of my colleagues in the officer ranks. In other words, practices which seem good at certain levels of our organization (I am speaking of ecclesiastical practice, standard of meetings, uniform standards and others) do not resonate with much of the rank and file. Maybe I am wrong.

I don't doubt the intentions of our leaders or others. I believe them to be good people. I just feel that there may not be as keen a cultural awareness as there needs to be. I think that many of their decisions have led my colleagues to feel a sense of impossibility in their ministry and have almost frozen them into inaction.

I work with some forward thinking leaders in my office. I see them as people who, while maintaining a form of godly discipline, also see the need for freedom and not a utilitarian way of operating.

I know I have beat around the bush a bit. So I will lay it out there for everyone. I think there might be at this time a sense of what Brian McLaren calls "The Tyranny of Impossibility" in our ranks. "They won't approve it." "It is too hard." "It does not make sense" are among the comments I get regarding some of our practices and some of the projects in which I am participating. It freezes people and they feel "Why should I even go forward? It will never change." Impossiblity hangs over everything. It is tyrannical in its nature.

I got a glimpse this weekend at our family camp that God is about to break the tyranny of the impossible in our midst. The sessions were simple in nature. There was not much in the way of pomp and circumstance. The Spirit spoke to many of His desire for more in our lives. A drama was presented lifting up the non-conformists of our past as heroes. I believe God spoke powerfully through that presentation.

McLaren points out in his writings that he never thought Apartheid would be abolished. He never thought racism would be anything less than overt (although we are cognizant it still exists.) We never thought the Berlin wall would come down. It did! Few people expected that things would change. They just took for granted that they would stay the way they were. There were the few who were convinced in their spirits that change was necessary and that as a culture or nation God was calling us to change. These few who refused to accept a conformist view, under the power of God, brought change.

Do I believe that The Army will once again capture its roots as the movement of non-conformists for the sake of the Gospel? I believe it can. It is not impossible! In fact, I think the idea of non-conformity, not rebellion to godly principle, may be what saves the day for our movement! It may mean that people will not get "promoted." It may mean we will not be the spit polished, corporate-minded and tame people which seems to be what is valued. It is interesting that there are those who beat the drum for mission at all costs and then say, "It has to be done this way." by their actions.

So I guess this post is for those of you who feel at times like I do. You feel like a square peg in a round hole. You face life thinking your vision of where you believe God is leading you, that has been confirmed by the Body, will never come to fruition, because our system won't allow it. Maybe you are thinking that your ministry will never be able to afford it. I say, that is the tyranny of the impossible speaking. Jesus says, "Nothing is impossible to him who believes." Maybe it is time for some visionaries to step forward and work even in a non-conformist way to advance the Kingdom.

What do you think?